I remember when I found out Kenzie was pregnant.
It was a girl, it had to be.
I remember when I was shooting the video for her gender reveal and all day I heard people ask her,
“so what do you think it is?”
And every time Kenzie would say, “a girl.”
When the canons went off there wasn’t a doubt in my mind, I was going to be looking at pink confetti.
It had to be a little baby girl.
I remember planning the proposal with Ken. We were both so nervous and so excited, I couldn’t breathe half the time and I remember how happy I felt when I saw the look on Kenzie’s face. I remember how happy I felt when they hugged right after. And I remember how happy I felt sitting in my car, going over the shots I just got thinking to myself
“Damn. I got it.”
I remember trying to plan out the month of February around Stella’s arrival. She was due February 13th but Kenzie thought she would have her early, and me living four hours away, I had to be ready to drive up when she needed me to.
The week Stella came was probably one of my worst weeks of 2020, lol. My car had a new problem every day, the brakes, the starter, losing oil for reasons unknown to all mechanics, and my day job was falling apart. People getting sick and missing days when we needed them most, two people quit sending us ten steps back, and my lease got renewed which means my rent went up. I didn’t know how I was going to press pause on life to drive up to take these photos. But I knew I had to. And I knew if I didn’t, I would always regret it.
And then there she was. The tiniest little baby I have ever seen, so beautiful with so much hair haha.
There’s a lot of things I don’t share with people about being a photographer, number one being, I am always so. so. so. scared. And that is also the number one reason why I do it.
I read something around the time that my mom passed away that stuck with me in a way that has helped shape my attitude towards life,
“When it feels scary to jump, that is exactly when you jump. Otherwise, you end up staying in the same place your whole life.”
The world of photography and videography can be intimidating because it is always evolving. You have to learn new techniques, new equipment, new ways to edit, new ways to light. There are so many things I don’t even know that I don’t know.
And anything can go wrong. All the time.
When I did Kenzie + Ken’s gender reveal, I hadn’t ever done a videography job.
When I photographed their proposal, I had only ever photographed one other proposal. Ever.
And when I drove four hours last Friday to photograph little Stella’s arrival, I had only ever done three in home shoots, and I had never, ever,
done a new born shoot.
I was so. scared.
But if I’ve learned anything about this job, just pick up your camera, and do the things you know. I know that I love to take pictures. I know that I know how to. I know how to set ISO. I know how to set shutter speed. I know what aperture I want to use. I know my camera and my lenses pretty well - I trust them. I know how to compensate for poor lighting during and in post.
And I know, that I love photographing the people I love.
So thank you both for always trusting me to get the job done even when I’m scared. I’m always growing and learning more in this position and it helps to have people who let your light shine through.
And thank you thank you thank you for letting me be apart of these sweet little magical moments. Finding out you’re having a little baby girl, your engagement, and now meeting Stella just days after she was born. I can’t describe the feeling, but I know I’m lucky.
Welcome to the world Stella, it was a pleasure to meet you.